Depression is a terrible disease – and not just for the sufferer themselves. The families and partners of depressed people also suffer from the situation. These clues can help them.
"When depression has you in its grip, life turns to water. The air around you turns to water, crippling you with its weight, and even the simplest tasks are suddenly difficult. You feel sluggish, mentally and physically, and nothing can get you out of it."
Outsiders often find it difficult to understand what is going on in people with depression. To this day, some prejudices and myths about the disease persist, making it difficult not only for those affected, but also for those close to them.
1. The worst thing is the fear
It’s not just the fear that it will never be over. Or that it could get worse. It’s also the fear that friendships or relationships will break down because of it.
That people turn away because they simply don’t understand the condition. Because they can’t comprehend that sometimes dates have to be canceled at the last second because it’s just not a good day.
If you love or are friends with someone with depression, you should let them know as often as possible that this anxiety is unfounded.
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2. It is a real illness
Depression is considered a mental illness, but that doesn’t make it any less bad or any less noticeable. They may not be visible, they may not be tangible, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t there. It can even be proven.
When the brain lacks chemicals like dopamine, serotonin, adrenaline or noradrenaline, it triggers a mental imbalance.
3. Depression should never be confused with weakness
Those who suffer from depression are not weak. It is even possible that it makes a person more creative, efficient and empathetic.
Self-reflection takes on a big role for depressives. Research has shown that they have better judgment and sharper perception.
4. The simplest things can be a great challenge
For a person with depression, just getting out of bed can be a challenge. Taking a shower. Driving to work.
Those who have never suffered from depression cannot understand it. Therefore, you just have to trust that the person is telling you the truth and not try to compare your reality with theirs.
5. There is not always a logical reason
Depression is deceitful. Sufferers can have a good day and all of a sudden depression pulls them into the abyss. There doesn’t always have to be a good reason for this.
Sometimes the sadness can hardly be explained, the pain hardly put into words. Don’t look for a reason you can understand, but try to accept the situation.
6. Depression does not go away when you "pull yourself together"
Sayings like "Get a grip", or "Get over it" Are incredibly hurtful to people with depression. They reinforce their sense of being a disappointment.
Of course they are trying to overcome the illness. But just like any other illness, it doesn’t work overnight. It’s a struggle and not just a decision.
7. You probably don’t know how bad it really is
People with depression often try to hide the true depths of their condition. Often they don’t want to admit to themselves how bad they feel and that they need help.
If you love someone with depression, it’s possible that they haven’t told you how dark they really are. Possibly because he wants to protect both of you and your relationship.
8. They don’t want to be a burden to you
People battling depression don’t want to be a burden to others. They don’t want to spread their negative mood to others.
Depressed people don’t look for attention or sympathy – on the contrary. The thing they crave most is to be treated like everyone else.
9. Depressed people are more sensitive to their environment
People with depression are usually very sensitive to their environment. In doing so, they can run the risk of getting too caught up in how others are feeling and feeling like the whole world is on their shoulders.
If you love a person with depression, tell them exactly what your needs are and ask them about theirs – it will help them.
10. There is more than one reality
When someone is obviously going through a difficult time, a very natural impulse is to describe their own experience to make it clear that you can understand their suffering.
But in most cases you can’t. Your reality has nothing to do with his reality. The most you can do to help is to listen.
11. Their depression has nothing to do with you
If you love a person with depression, it is important to understand that his state of mind has nothing to do with you. This can sometimes be very difficult.
When your partner is feeling bad, the fear that it might be because of you is obvious. But it’s important to understand that a person’s depression is basically about them – not you.
12. It’s okay if you are unhappy
Loving a person who suffers from depression is a challenge. The person needs your love and attention, they need to know that you support them.
But that doesn’t mean your feelings and moods matter any less. If you’re unhappy, it’s okay to say so. This is the only way you can figure out what works best for both of you.